When you are invited, attend with the intention that you are attending a blessed and good invitation, one which is delightful and approved in the Shari’ah. Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] has also commanded us to attend such occasions. Dress appropriately within the confines of Shari’ah. For such pleasant gatherings, the Sahabah [Radiallahu anhum] used to dress properly when they visited each other. When initiating or sharing in a discussion, make sure your conversation fits the happy ocassion. Dont discuss such things which will depress those present or any other distasteful subject matter. A believer should be wise and considerable.
It is recommended that you congratulate the bride and bridegroom by reciting the du’a of Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam]:
بَارَكَ اللّهُ لَكَ وَبَارَكَ عَلَيكَ وَجَمَعَ بَينَكُمَا فِى خَيرٍ
Barakallahu laka wa baaraka ‘alaika wa jama’a bainakuma fi khair
May Allah bless you and bless your counterpart and may Allah tie your union with virtue. [Sunan Abí Dáwud, Sunan Tirmidhi, Sunan Ibn Majah and Al-Hákim]
Do not use the commonly used phrase “with comfort and children,” because this was the phrase used by people of ignorance (Jahiliyah). Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] has prohibited it and Allah has replaced it with thw prayer of Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] (as mentioned above).
Sayyidah ‘Áishah [Radiallahu anha] said, “When Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] married me, my mother led me into the house where the women of the Ansar were seated. They congratulated me by saying,
عَلَى الْخَيرِ وَالْبَرَكَةِ, وَعَلَى خَيرِ طَائِرٍ
“May you have all the good, all the blessings and the best of luck.” [Sahih Bukhari]
Islam permits women to celebrate a wedding by singing tasteful songs accompanied by beating of the duff. Such poems and songs should not promote lust, lewd desires and sin. Instead, they should sing delightful and decent songs to express their happiness and joy with the marriage.
Sayyidah ‘Áishah [Radiallahu anha] said, “A bride was led to her Ansari husband. Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] said, “O ‘Áishah! Do you not have any items of entertainment? The Ansar love to be entertained. ” [Sahih Bukhari] Rasulullah [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] was referring to singing and beating of the duff.
Hafidh Ibn Hajar [Rahimahullah] in his book, Fathul Bári, has stated that in one narration of Tabarání, Sayyidah ‘Áishah [Radiallahu anha] recalled that the Prophet [Sallallahu álayhi wa sallam] asked, “Why did you not send with her (the bride), a girl to sing with the duff?” I enquired, “What should she sing?” He answered:
We are visiting you, we are visiting you,
If you greet us, we will greet you,
For your gold, bright and red, brought the
Bride to your valley,
And it is your brown and tanned wheat that
Made your virgins charming.
Songs sung at wedding should have delightful and decent meanings such as this. Songs of lust, passion and immorality are strictly prohibited.
Islamic Etiquette 