‘Abdullah Ibn Mubarak [Rahimahullah] said:
“If I leave out a single etiquette of Islam, I fear that Allah will deprive me of all that He has bestowed me with.”
Etiquettes of Speech According to Sunnah
November 9, 2012 at 3:38 pm (Speech)
Tags: al adhkar, etiquette, islam, manners, Muslim, nawawi, speech
Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported: “I heard the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, saying: “A person utters a word thoughtlessly (i.e., without thinking about whether it is good or evil) and as a result, will plummet into the fire of Hell deeper than the distance between the east and the west.” [Al-Bukhaari & Muslim]
Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported that the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: “A man may utter a word pleasing to Allaah without considering it of any significance, but for which Allaah elevates his ranks (in Paradise); another one may speak a word displeasing to Allaah without considering it of any importance, but for which he would be plummeted into Hell.” [Al-Bukhaari]
Abu ‘Abdur-Rahmaan Bilaal bin Al-Haarith Al-Muzani, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported that the Messenger of Allaah sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: “A man may speak a good word without knowing its worth, for which Allaah records for him His good pleasure until the Day he will meet Him; another man may utter an evil word without realising its importance, for which Allaah records for him His displeasure until the Day he will meet Him.” [Maalik & At-Tirmithi]
When the Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam was talking to Mu’aath, may Allaah be pleased with him, he told him: “The root (i.e. foundation) of this matter is Islaam, its pillar (mainstay) is the prayer and its apex is Jihaad (fighting in the cause of Allaah).” Then he sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam asked: “Shall I tell you of that which holds together all these things?” Mu’aath, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: “Yes, O Messenger of Allaah!” So he sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam held his tongue between his fingers, and said: “Restrain this.” Mu’aath, may Allaah be pleased with him, asked: “O Messenger of Allaah! Will we really be held to account for what we say?” The Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam exclaimed: “May your mother lose you! Most people will be thrown on their faces into the Hellfire on account of their tongues.” [Ahmad & At-Tirmithi]
Ibn Mas’ood, may Allaah be pleased with him: “That which requires imprisonment the most is one’s tongue.”
`Adiyy bin Haatim, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported the Messenger of Allaah sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam as saying: “Allaah will surely speak to every one of you without an interpreter. He (i.e., the one being spoken to) will look to his right and see nothing but (deeds) which he had done, and will look to his left and see nothing but (deeds) which he had done. Then he will look in front of him and will find nothing except the Hellfire facing him. So protect (yourselves) from the Fire, even if by giving in charity half a date, and if you cannot find that, then with a kind word.” [Al-Bukhaari & Muslim]
Silence is Golden…quotes from Nawawi’s Kitab Al-Adhkaar
Imam Shafi’ 
said: “When one wishes to say something, then it is upon him to think before he speaks. If there is beneficial good in what he will say, then he should speak. If he has doubt about that, then he must not speak until that doubt is removed.”
al-Fudayl ibn ‘Iyaad said: “Whoever limits his speech to be in accordance with his actions will (surely) lessen his speech on that which doesn’t concern him.”
Imam Shafi’ adviced one of his students: “Do not speak about things that do not concern you, for indeed, every time that you speak a word, it takes control of you and you do not have any control over it!”
Abdullah ibn Mas’ood 
said: “There is nothing that deserves to be imprisoned more than the tongue.”
Abul-Qaasim al-Qushayree said: “Remaining silent is salvation and that is a fundamental principle. Staying quiet at the appropriate time is a characteristic of manhood, just as speaking when it is right to do so is from the most honorable of manners.”
Patience at the time of bereavement
August 12, 2011 at 7:59 am (Condolences)
Tags: Condolences, etiquette, ibn qayyim, islam, manners, Muslim
The loss of a loved one is a time when a person may be overwhelmed with grief, and many customs surrounding bereavement reflect the depth of the feeling of loss. Wailing, eulogizing (i.e. praising the deceased excessively) and tearing one’s garments are all customs which were well known at the time of Jâhiliyyah, and are still common among some Muslims. Such conduct is not permitted in Islâm, as the believer is required to face bereavement, like all the other trials of life, with patience.
It is permitted to cry or weep, softy, before death, at the time of death, and after the person has died. According to ash-Shâfi‘î, however, it is makrûh to cry after the person has died, but permissible before the soul has departed.
The correct opinion is that crying is permitted both before and after death. The evidence for this is the hadîth narrated by Jâbir ibn ‘Abdullâh (RA) in which he said: “My father died at the battle of Uhud, and I began to weep. The people told me to stop, but the Messenger (SAAS) never asked me to stop. Then my aunt Fâtimah began to weep too, and the Prophet (SAAS) said: ‘It does not matter whether you cry or not, the angels kept shading him until they ascended with his soul’ ” (agreed upon).
Ibn ‘Abbâs (RA) reported that when Ruqayyah (RA), the daughter of the Prophet (SAAS), died, the women started to cry, and ‘Umar (RA) began to whip them to make them stop. The Prophet (SAAS) told him: “O ‘Umar, leave them alone and let them cry.” To the women he said: “Go ahead and cry, but avoid the crying of the shaytân. Whatever comes from the eye and heart is from Allâh and is a sign of mercy, and whatever comes from your hand and your tongue is from the shaytân.” (Ahmad)
A number of sound ahâdîth describe the Prophet (SAAS) weeping on a number of occasions when someone he loved had died. When the Prophet (SAAS) visited the tomb of his mother he wept, and caused others to weep. When he was burying the martyr ‘Uthmân ibn Madh’un (RA) after Uhud, he kissed him and his tears fell on ‘Uthmân’s face. When he gave the news of the death of Ja’far (RA) and his companions in the battle against the Romans at Mu’tah, he spoke with tears streaming down his face.
Another sound report describes how Abû Bakr (RA) wept when he kissed the Prophet (SAAS) after he had died. The ahâdîth that forbid crying should be interpreted as referring to the kind of crying that is accompanied by eulogizing and wailing.
Eulogizing and wailing
Eulogizing the dead and wailing in grief are harâm, according to Ahmad, ash-Shâfi‘î and others. In a hadîth narrated from ‘Abdullâh ibn Mas‘ûd (RA), that the Prophet (SAAS) said: “He is not one of us who strikes himself on the cheeks, rends his garment and behaves like the people of Jâhiliyyah” (al-Bukhârî and Muslim).
Abû Mâlik al-Ash‘arî (RA) said: “The Prophet (SAAS) said: ‘There are four habits which my Ummah has, which are from the Jahiliyyah. My Ummah will never rid itself of them. They are: seeking pride in noble descent; slandering one another by casting doubts one one’s lineage; seeking rain through astrology; and wailing.’ ” In another hadîth, the
Prophet (SAAS) said that if a woman practices the custom of wailing, and does not repent before she dies, on the Day of Resurrection she will be raised with clothes of tar and a shield of scabs. (Muslim)
Abû Mûsâ (RA) said: “The Prophet (SAAS) said: ‘The deceased person suffers because of the wailing of the living. When the wailing woman says, “What a great loss! I have lost my right arm, the one who clothed me”, the deceased will be pulled up sharply and asked: “Are you her right hand? Are you her support? Are you the one who clothed
her?” (Ahmad).
There is no doubt that wailing and eulogizing are harâm. How could it be otherwise, when they indicate discontent with one’s Lord and contradict patience? Behaving this way harms oneself too, when one slaps one’s face, pulls out one’s hair, prays to Allâh to take one’s soul, wastes possessions by tearing one’s clothes, complains of injustice from Allâh and praises the deceased with qualities that he did not possess. Any of these would be sufficient grounds for the total prohibition of wailing and eulogizing.
Saying a few words
It is permissible to say a few words when crying over a deceased person, so long as these words are true, and are not accompanied by wailing or expression of discontent with the decree of Allâh. Such brief words do not contradict patience, and are not harâm. Anas (RA) reported that Abû Bakr (RA) entered upon the Prophet (SAAS) after he had passed
away, put his hands on his temples, kissed him between the eyes and said: “O my Prophet, O my dearest friend, O my beloved.” (Ahmad)
Anas (RA) reported that when the Prophet (SAAS) became very ill, he started to lose conciousness. Fâtimah (RA) said, “How great is the distress of my father!” He said, “There will be no more distress for your father after today.” When the Prophet (SAAS) passed away, she said, “O my father who answered the call of his Lord, O my father whose destination is Paradise, O my father, to Jibrîl will tell the news of your death.” After the Prophet (SAAS) had been buried, she said, “O Anas, how could you bear to bury the Prophet and cover him with dust?” (al-Bukhârî)
When his son Ibrâhîm died, the Prophet (SAAS) said, “We are very sad for your death, O Ibrâhîm.” This does not indicate discontent with the decree of Allâh or complaining against Allâh. Such statements are no more than crying or weeping.
The deceased person suffers because of people’s wailing over him
A sahîh hadîth narrated from ‘Umar ibn al-Khattâb (RA) and his son, and al-Mughîrah ibn Shu‘bah indicates that a deceased person suffers because of people’s wailing over him. There should be no problem in understanding this hadîth, and it should not be seen as contradicting the Qur’ân or the basic principles of Sharî‘ah. It does not mean that a man can be punished because of another’s deeds. The Prophet (SAAS) did not say that the deceased person will be punished because of his family’s crying over him. What he said was that the deceased suffers because of that, meaning that it hurts him. Similarly, a dead person in the grave might suffer when a person in a neighbouring grave is being punished, just as in the life it hurts him to see his neighbour being punished. So when the family of a deceased person cries, wails and eulogizes him, like the people of Jâhiliyyah used to do, the deceased person will be hurt in his grave because of it. This is the suffering that is referred to in the hadîth.
‘Uddat as Sabirin by Ibn Qayyim
Allah Has Combined All of Medicine (at-Tibb) in One Verse of the Qur’an
January 26, 2011 at 4:35 pm (eating)
Tags: drinking, eating, etiquette, islam, manners, Muslim
All praise is due to Allah and may the prayers and salutations be upon His Messenger, to proceed:
Allah the Most High said,
وَكُلُوا وَاشْرَبُوا وَلَا تُسْرِفُوا ۚ إِنَّهُ لَا يُحِبُّ الْمُسْرِفِينَ
“…And eat and drink and be not excessive (therein)…” (al-A’raaf 7:31)
Ibn Kathir commented upon this verse:
One of the Salaf said: Allah has combined the entirety of medicine (at-tibb) in half a verse, “And eat and drink and be not excessive…”
Al-Qurtubi commented upon this verse, after mentioning that excessive eating is makrooh (disliked), he mentions the benefits of eating little:
… In eating little there are many benefits. From them that a man becomes of sounder body, of better memory, purer in understanding, (requiring) less sleep, and lighter in (his) soul…
Then he mentioned the harms of eating excessively:
… and in eating much there is the overstuffing of the stomach and putrefaction of undigested food, and from this the variety of diseases are produced, and thus he requires treatment more than what the one who eats little requires. Some of the physicians said, “The greatest treatment (dawaa’) is (appropriate) estimation of food.” And the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) has explained this meaning sufficiently and completely which does away with the speech of the physicians, so he said, “The son of Adam does not fill a container worse than his stomach. It is sufficient for the son of Aadam to take enough morsels of food to keep his back straight (keep him able-bodied). And if it is necessary, then a third for his food, a third for his drink, and a third for his breath.”…
Then a little later al-Qurtubi says:
And it is mentioned that (the caliph) ar-Rashid used to have a shrewd Christian physician who said to Ali bin Hasan, “There is not in your Book (the Qur’aan) anything of the knowledge of medicine, and knowledge of is of two types, knowledge of the religions and knowledge of the bodies.” So he said to him, “Allaah has combined all of medicine in half a verse in our Book.” So he said, “What is it?” He said, “The saying of Allah, the Mighty and Majestic: And eat and drink and be not excessive.”…
And Imaam ad-Dhahabi in his book “at-Tibb an-Nabawi” (p. 34-35) says:
The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said: “The son of Aadam does not fill a container worse than his stomach. It is sufficient for the son of Aadam to take enough morsels of food to keep his back straight (keep him able-bodied). And if it is necessary, then a third for his food, a third for his drink, and a third for his breath.” This was reported by an-Nasaa’ee and at-Tirmidhi, who said, “Hasan Sahih” … and this is one from the aspects of preserving health.
Ali bin Hasan said:
“And Allah, the Sublime and Exalted has combined the whole of medicine in (just) half a verse, so He, the Most High said,
“And eat and drink and be not excessive…”
Taken from “Lives of the Salaf”
The Advice of the Salaf Regarding the Early Upbringing of the Child – Part 2
September 17, 2010 at 10:46 am (Children)
Tags: children, etiquette, Ibn Qudama, islam, manners, Mukhtasar Minhaj al Qasidin, Muslim
The child is taught to not boast in front of his friends and peers about something that his parents own, or to boast regarding his food and clothes. Rather he is nurtured upon modesty and being kind and generous to whomsoever he has a relationship with. And he is to be prevented from taking something from another child like him. He should be taught that inferiority is in taking and that superiority and dignity is in giving. And he should be made to not like gold and silver.
He is to be prohibited from spitting in gatherings, blowing his nose, yawning in front of others, and from sitting with his legs pointed, one on top of the other.
He should also be accustomed to speaking little and should not speak except when answering a question or fulfilling a request. He should also master the skill of listening well, when others are speaking especially if the one speaking is older than him. He is to be taught to stand for the one who has authority over him and to sit close to, next to, or in front of such a person.
He is to be prevented from lewd speech and that he keeps company with those who use such speech – for indeed the foundation of protecting a child lies in keeping him away from bad friends.
It is also from good practice that when the child finishes from his studying that he is allowed to play in a good way, so that he is able to relax from the difficulty and strictness of learning and discipline. It is has been said,
‘Relax the heart and mind; strengthen the memorisation and intellect.’
The child should be cultivated upon obedience towards his parents and towards the one who educates him, and he should revere such people.
Thereafter, when he reaches the age of seven years, he is to be ordered with the Salaah (obligatory prayers), and he is not to be excused from not being in a state of purity (by knowing the wudhu, and remaining in this state) so that he becomes used to it. He should also be reprimanded from lying and deceit, and then when he approaches puberty he should be taught the various rulings of Islaam and be made responsible for them.
You should know that food is a type of medicine and the objective behind eating is to strengthen the body in order to show obedience of Allah, the most High, through worship. This Dunya (worldly life) will not remain forever and death cuts off the pleasures of this world. Death awaits each person and may arrive any hour. The intelligent one, therefore, is the one who prepares for the Aakhirah (the Hereafter).
Hence, if the upbringing of the child is righteous then this will all become firm in his heart – similar to how an engraving becomes very firm on a stone.
Sahl Ibn Abdullah once said, “I was a child of three years, and I would stay awake at night looking at my uncle, Muhammed bin Sawwaar, praying. So he said to me one day, “why don’t you remember Allah, the one who created you?”
So I asked, “and how do I remember Him?”
He replied, “Say, three times in your heart without moving your tongue: Allah is with me, Allah is watching over me, Allah is a witness over me.”
I then said this a number of nights until I became accustomed to this. He then said to me, “say it eleven times every night.”
So I said it, and I felt the sweetness of this statement in my heart.
A year on from this, my uncle said to me “Memorise and safeguard what I have taught you, and act according to it up until you enter your grave”
So I continued acting upon these words for years and I would find the sweetness of it in my privacy.
He then said, “O Sahl, whomsoever Allah is with, and He watches him and is a witness over him – do you think such a person should disobey Allah? Beware of disobeying Allah.”
After this, I advanced to school and memorised the Qur’aan when I was only six or seven years old. I would then fast all the time, my daily sustenance was bread made from barley and thereafter I would wake during the night in order to pray.”
Taken from here
The Advice of the Salaf Regarding the Early Upbringing of the Child – Part 1
September 9, 2010 at 10:44 am (Children)
Tags: child, etiquette, Ibn Qudama, islam, manners, Mukhtasar Minhaj al Qasidin, Muslim
Ibn Qudaamah al-Maqdisee
Mukhtasar Minhaaj Al-Qaasideen
You should know that the child is a trust upon his parents, his heart like an innocent gem that is open to any inscription upon it. So, if the child is accustomed to righteousness then he will develop and grow in it, and his parents and guardians will share with him the reward of living a pious and righteous life. Similarly, if the child is accustomed to evil then he will grow up in this – and so the sin will be upon the guardians. Therefore, the guardian of any child should safeguard, discipline and cultivate him; teaching him noble manners and protecting him from evil company.
The guardian of the child should not accustom him to luxury and he should make sure that the child does not become attached to the ways and means of beautification and affluence – otherwise the child will grow up wasting his life trying to seek this.
Rather, it is befitting that the guardian supervises the child from a young age – so the woman who breastfeeds and looks after the child (the mother or otherwise) should be a righteous and pious women who only eats from that which is Halaal – for indeed the milk that the woman produces after eating Haraam has no barakah (blessing ) in it.
Thereafter, the child will begin to think and distinguish, and the first sign of this is a sense of shyness. This shyness is an excellent indicator that the child’s mind and intellect are beginning to develop, and he is approaching the age of puberty. So the child is to be helped, disciplined and taught correct manners – through this shyness of his.
Then, when the first signs of him appetising for food become prevalent, he should be taught the manners of eating, and sometimes he is to be only given bread to eat[1] so he does not become attached to that which is eaten with it (the dish or condiment), considering it to be a necessity. Over-eating should also be made undesirable to him, and he is to be taught that over-eating resembles the eating of animals.
The child is be made to prefer clean, white clothes as opposed to dirty or silk clothing – whist also being taught that silk clothing is not worn except by women and effeminate men. The chid should also be prevented from mixing with other children who have become accustomed to luxury.
Thereafter, the child is occupied with school. He learns the Qur’aan, ahadeeth and is taught examples of righteous people, so that the love of the righteous becomes engrained in his heart. Furthermore, he should be made to avoid the listening and memorising of poetry containing mention of love and romance[2].
Whenever the child shows a beautiful characteristic, or a good action, then he should be appreciated and rewarded with something that he likes and is to be praised in the presence of other people.
However, if he opposes this (by doing a bad action), it can at times be overlooked and not exposed. If he then persists upon this action, he is to be warned in secret and is made to be afraid that other people may find out. However, the child should be not be disciplined and warned too often, as this type of treatment will make him accustomed to being censured and rebuked – rather the guardian should restrain himself from using threatening speech with the child.
It is also befitting that the mother disciplines the child using the father (i.e. by using the natural standing, authority and fear of the father.)
The child should be prevented from sleeping during the day as it results in laziness and he should not be prevented from sleeping during the night. He should not be given a soft mattress – being prevented from it so that his bones and skeleton become strong. It is befitting that he becomes accustomed to coarseness in his food, clothing and sleep[3]. He should also be made accustomed to walking, activity and exercise so he is not overcome with laziness.
——————————————————————————–
Footnotes:
[1] I asked Shaykh ‘AbdulRazzaq Al-‘Abbaad (May Allah preserve him) regarding this statement, and other passages in this article that are similar to it, he said that there is no clear evidence from the Qur’an or Sunnah to say we should do this, however a person considers the state of the child and that which will benefit him. So if one was to see from a child an excessive likening to food then sometimes he can take this action. Similar to this is the statement of the author “It is befitting that he is accustomed to coarseness in his food, clothing and sleep,” one can do this sometimes to teach the child that blessings such as food and clothing do not last forever, and that it is not befitting for a Muslim to concern himself too much with this. As for the ahadeeth stating that Allah loves for blessings to be seen on a person, then this is without the heart becoming attached to these worldly blessings but rather from the view point of showing gratitude to Allah, and that the Muslim should remain clean and beautiful as Allah loves cleanliness and beauty.
[2] Similar to this – or indeed more destructive – is the existence of music and films containing such content, which have unfortunately become widespread in Muslim homes.
[3] See footnote 1.
Taken from here
Overeating During Iftar
August 28, 2010 at 12:38 am (Fasting)
Tags: etiquette, fasting, iftar, imam ghazzali, islam, manners, Muslim
“…One should not overeat while breaking the fast to the point that he fills his stomach, as there isn’t any container that Allah hates more than a full stomach. How can one benefit from fasting and subdue this enemy and break this desire if he breaks his fast by making up for it through eating everything that he missed out on during the day? In fact, some even eat more than they usually would during the day! This habit has continued to the point that so many types of food are prepared for Ramadan that more food is eaten in this month than in any other month.
It is known that the whole point of fasting is to hold back and to break one’s desire in order to strengthen the soul with taqwa. So, if you prevent your digestive system from food all day long until night such that its desire and longing for food goes wild, and you then feed it what it wants until it is fully satisfied, this will only increase its desire and multiply its energy, and it will manifest a longing that wouldn’t have been there had it been left to its usual intake.
So, the essence and secret of fasting is to weaken this energy that provides means for Satan to pull you towards what is bad, and this can’t happen unless you reduce your food intake. When you break your fast, eat only what you would normally eat at that specific time when not fasting. But to break your fast by combining the amount you would’ve eaten during the day with the amount you usually eat at night will leave you having gained nothing at all from your fast.
In fact, from the etiquette of fasting is to not sleep much during the day in order to feel the hunger and thirst, and in order to weaken this energy. This will clean out the heart and keep this energy weakened every night so that it will be easier to pray at night and do your sets of Qur’an recitation and dhikr of Allah. Maybe this will prevent Satan from approaching your heart and allow you to look to what is in the kingdom of the heavens, and the Night of Qadr is basically the night in which some of what is contained in this kingdom is shown, and this is what is meant by Allah’s Saying: {“Indeed, We have descended it on the Night of Qadr.”}
And whoever puts a barrier of food between his heart and his chest will have a barrier put between himself and what is shown from this kingdom, and to keep your stomach free isn’t enough to lift this barrier if your mind isn’t free from anything other than Allah – and this is the entire point.
The starting point of all this is to reduce your intake of food…”
[‘Ihya’ ‘Ulum ad-Din’; 1/303]
Etiquette of Reading and Handling the Qur’an
July 30, 2010 at 12:12 pm (Qur'an)
Tags: etiquette, islam, manners, Muslim, Quran, qurtubi
Imam Muhammad ibn Ahmad Qurtubi says in al-Jami’ li ahkam al-Qur’an
It is the inviolability of the Qur’an:
1. not to touch the Qur’an except in the state of ritual purity in wudu, and to recite it when in a state of ritual purity;
2. to brush one’s teeth with a toothstick (siwak), remove food particles from between the them, and to freshen one’s mouth before reciting, since it is the way through which the Qur’an passes;
3. to sit up straight if not in prayer, and not lean back;
4. to dress for reciting as if intending to visit a prince, for the reciter is engaged in an intimate discourse;
5. to face the direction of prayer (qiblah) to recite;
6. to rinse the mouth out with water if one coughs up mucus or phlegm;
7. to stop reciting when one yawns, for when reciting , one is addressing one’s Lord in intimate conversation, while yawning is from the Devil;
8. when begining to recite, to take refuge from in Allah from the accursed Devil and say the Basmala, whether one has begun at the first surah or some other part one has reached;
9. once one has begun, not to interrupt one’s recital from moment to moment with human words, unless absolutely necessary;
10. to be alone when reciting it, so that no one interrupts one, forcing one to mix the words of the Qur’an with replying, for this nullifies the effectivness of having taken refuge in Allah from the Devil at the beginning;
11. to recite it leisurely and without haste, distinctly pronouncing each letter;
12. to use one’s mind and understanding in order to comprehend what is being said to one;
13. to pause at verses that promise Allah’s favour, to long for Allah Most High and ask of His bounty; and at verses that warn of His punishment to ask Him to save one from it;
14. to pause at the accounts of bygone peoples and individuals to heed and benefit from their example;
15. to find out the meanings of the Qur’an’s unusual lexical usages;
16. to give each letter its due so as to clearly and fully pronounce every word, for each letter counts as ten good deeds;
17. whenever one finishes reciting, to attest to the veracity of ones’s Lord, and that His messenger (Allah bless him and grant him peace) has delivered his message, and to testify to this, saying: “Our Lord, You have spoken the truth, Your messengers have delivered their tidings, and bear witness to this. O Allah, make us of those who bear witness to the truth and who act with justice”: after which one supplicates Allah with prayers.
18. not to select certain verses from each surah to recite, but rather the recite the whole surah;
19. if one puts down the Qur’an, not to leave it open;
20. not to place other books upon the Qur’an, which should always be higher than all other books, whether they are books of Sacred Knowledge or something else;
21. to place the Qur’an on one’s lap when reading; or on something in front of one, not on the floor;
22. not to wipe it from a slate with spittle, but rather wash it off with water; and if one washes it off with water, to avoid putting the water where there are unclean substances (najasa) or where people walk. Such water has its own inviolability, and there were those of the early Muslims before us who used water that washed away Qur’an to effect cures.
23. not to use sheets upon which it has been written as bookcovers, which is extremely rude, but rather to erase the Qur’an from them with water;
24. not to let a day go by without looking at least once at the pages of the Qur’an;
25. to give one’s eyes their share of looking at it, for the eyes lead to the soul (nafs), whereas there is a veil between the breast and the soul, and the Qur’an is in the breast.
26. not to trivially quote the Qur’an at the occurrence of everyday events, as by saying, for example, when someone comes, “You have come hither according to a decree, O Moses” [Qur’an 69:24],
or, “Eat and drink heartily for what you have done aforetimes, in days gone by” [Qur’an 69:24], when food is brought out, and so forth;
27. not to recite it to songs tunes like those of the corrupt, or with the tremulous tones of Christians or the plaintiveness of monkery, all of which is misguidance;
28. when writing the Qur’an to do so in a clear, elegant hand;
29. not to recite it out aloud over another’s reciting of it, so as to spoil it for him or make him resent what he hears, making it as if it were some kind of competition;
30. not to recite it in marketplaces, places of clamour and frivolity, or where fools gather;
31. not to use the Qur’an as pillow, or lean upon it;
32. not to toss it when one wants to hand it to another;
33. not to miniaturize the Qur’an, mix into it what is not of it, or mingle this worldly adornment with it by embellishing or writing it with gold;
34. not to write it on the ground or on walls, as is done in some new mosques;
35. not to write an amulet with it and enter the lavatory, unless it is encased in leather, silver, or other, for then it is as if kept in the heart;
36. if one writes it and then drinks it (for cure or other purpose), one should say the Basmala at every breath and make a noble and worthy intention, for Allah only gives to one according to one’s intention;
37. and if one finishes reciting the entire Qur’an, to begin it anew, that it may not resemble something that has been abandoned.
Etiquettes of Visiting People
July 25, 2010 at 5:08 pm (Uncategorized)
Tags: etiquette, islam, manners, Muslim, visit
Sending Flowers and Reading Quran during Funerals
July 20, 2010 at 3:08 pm (Condolences)
Tags: Condolences, etiquette, flowers, islam, manners, Muslim, Quran, Shaykh Abdul Fattah Abu Ghuddah
It should be noted that many people at the death of a dear person will bring flowers and wreaths and after proceeding with the funeral, will take the flowers and wreaths to the home of the deceased. They buy the best flowers and wreaths to show their deep sympathy and concern. To do this is forbidden – whether presenting it at the funeral, accompanying the funeral with it, or bringing it to the deceased’s house. This is an imitation of non- Muslims, and is an evil innovation which should be strictly avoided. Those who do such a thing will have no reward from Allah. To the contrary, they will be questioned for such meaningless waste.
Another misguided innovation during funerals is that the car that carries the deceased will broadcast, through speakers, a recording of the Holy Qur’an as if announcing the passing away of the deceased. The funeral procession should be characterized by thoughtfulness, humbleness, remembrance, reflection, awareness of Allah, and prayers for mercy. No sad music or religious chant should accompany funerals. These two rules should be followed and spread around to make Muslims aware of the right way.
Purifying the private parts and the etiquettes of answering the call of nature
July 15, 2010 at 6:50 am (Bathroom)
Tags: bathroom, call of nature, etiquette, islam, manners, Muslim
If one enters the bathroom he enters with the left leg first and says,
“In the Name of Allah (bismillah), Oh Allah, indeed, I seek refuge with You from the unclean and the filth.”[1]
When he exits, [he exits] with his right and says,
“You forgive (ghufraanak). All praise to Allah, Who kept from me the harmful and pardoned me from the harm.”[2]
When sitting down, he should lean on his left leg and raise his right leg; shield himself with a wall or something similar and stay away from open spaces. It is not permissible to relieve oneself on the roadways, the streets, place where people sit, underneath fruit bearing trees, or anyplace that can cause people harm. He should not face toward the Qiblah nor place his backside towards it while relieving himself. He (s) said,
“When you go to relieve yourselves, do not face towards the Qiblah, nor turn your backs towards it, whether you are urinating or defecating; rather face towards the east or the west.”[3]
After relieving himself, if he wipes with three stones or something similar, or cleaned the area and purified himself with water, then that is enough. It is sufficient to restrict to one of them only. He should not wipe himself with dung, manure, animal droppings, or bones. The Prophet (s) prevented us from using such things, therefore it is forbidden.
It is sufficient to wash the impurities of the body and the clothing, [such as] stains and something similar until the contaminated area vanishes. This is because the legislation does not stipulate the number of washing for removing the impurity, except for the impurity of a dog. [For the impurity of a dog] it is stipluated that the washing of the contaminated area occur seven times, with one of them being with dirt or dust.
The impure things are: natural [menstrual] blood, urine, and blood. One is pardon for the blood that flows continuously, as this is an exception. For example the blood that is shed from an edible animal, without staying in the meat or the veins, is pure. From the impure is the urine and feces of every animal whose consumption is forbidden, thus every carnivorous animal is impure. Also, the dead [are impure], except the blood of the dead and any dead person who not longer retains any fluids in him. Fish, shrimp, crayfish, locust, grasshoppers are pure. Allah say,
“Forbidden for you are dead animals and blood.” (Al Ma’idah: 3)
The Messenger of Allah said,
“The believer is pure alive or dead.”[4]
He (s) also said,
“Permissible for you are the two dead and the two bloods; as for the two dead they are fish and locust; as for the two bloods they are the liver and spleen.”[5]
As for the feces and urine of animals whose consumption is permissible, it is clean. As for semen it is clean because the Prophet would clean off the sticky semen and scratch off the dried semen left on his clothing with his finger. Regarding the urine of a male toddler, who cannot consume solid foods, it is enough to sprinkle water on the [affected] area as he (s) said,
“Wash the urine of an infant girl and sprinkle water on the urine of an infant boy.”[6]
When the impure area decrease, it becomes clean and if the color or smell stays there is no harm. Likewise, the Prophet said to Khawlah bint Yasaar regarding menstruation blood,
“Water is sufficient for you and there is no harm in the [remaining] stain.”
[1] Related from ‘Anas. Bukhārī: 142, 5963; Muslim: 375.
[2] His (s) saying, “ghufraanak” is authentically reported and what comes after is not. Ghufraanak is reported by Abū Dāwūd: 30; al-Tirmidhī: 7; ibn Mājah: 300; Aḥmad: 6/155.
[3] Muslim: 264, Bukhārī: 144
[4] Al-Haakim in Mustadrak no. 1422. Saheeh without the statement “alive or dead”
[5] Ibn Mājah: 3314, and Ahmad: 2/97; it is sahīh.
[6] Abū Dāwūd: 376, al-Nisā’i: 305, ibn Mājah: 526, ibn Khuzaymah: 283, al-Ṭabārī: 22/384, al-Ḥākim: 589, and al-Bayhaqī: 2/415.
Islamic Etiquette 